There are two versions of Britain that I know well: the one I imagined moving to, and the one I actually encountered. The first is a fantasy version of the country, shaped by the media and popular culture – think stately homes, velvet blazers, and men named Oliver who speak softly about literature while sipping red wine. The second is my lived experience, where the reality is more grounded in meal deals, damp socks, and an unshakable acceptance of dryers that never quite work.
Between these two versions lies the truth, and as I’ve come to learn, that truth includes Take That.
For Americans, Take That is often a cultural blind spot. While names like Robbie Williams might be familiar due to his role in a monkey movie, the band itself never really crossed the Atlantic in the same way that One Direction or even The 1975 did. This means there’s a significant piece of British pop culture that has largely gone unnoticed by American audiences.
Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately?), my introduction to Take That wasn’t a gentle one. It was the uncensored music video for “Do What You Like.” To give you a sense of my real-time experience, I’ll share my notes and verbal reactions from that first encounter with this unforgettable audiovisual masterpiece.
Before watching: False confidence
I went into the video with a limited but confident understanding of Take That. I assumed they were just another British boy band. I also believed that Robbie Williams still refused to button his shirt because of his time with the group. And I thought that British people were deeply attached to them.
My editor mentioned that the video had a surprise in store that was “shocking.” As someone who watched the public reaction to Saltburn and thought, “Okay, so y’all have never been in love before or what?”, I wasn’t easily shocked.
I expected something charmingly dated – maybe some coordinated dancing, a wind machine, and at worst, a little light pelvic thrusting. Reader, I was wrong.
The opening: Mad Max, but make it Catholic?
The video starts with a scene that immediately caught my attention. I wrote in my notes: “Oh my god, their lil motorcycle outfits. Fun!” But then I noticed the crosses. Now I was thinking: post-apocalyptic priests? Mad Max, but they found a Hot Topic?
It’s leather, it’s fringe, it’s religious iconography, and it’s capri pants. Capri pants! Such hairless calves on them all!
There’s something deeply endearing about a group of men dressed like dystopian clergy who also look ready to teach a 2003 Zumba class. I also noted: “Wait, they’re all soooo cute, I get why teen girls had posters of these boys.”
Rosemary saw the David in the marble, and, with the strength and bravery of her foremothers, muttered to her PA: “More jelly,” thereby changing the course of this country forever.
Final Thoughts
Did I understand the cultural phenomenon that was Take That better after watching this? No! This experience was mystifying.
Still, I had fun! I laughed! I bobbed my head! I gasped!
Did I understand Britain better? Also no.
But I do understand that there is a very specific, very British flavour of pop culture that exists entirely outside the American gaze. A world where boy bands can be equal parts Catholic Mad Max, dessert-themed performance art, and full-frontal chaos.
Y’all keep your freakier stuff private and export your more palatable. I can understand that, and it’s a privilege to be let in on your secrets.
I will never look at jelly the same way again.
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