The Challenge of Balancing Screen Time and Family Connection
In recent years, the issue of screen time for young children has become a growing concern for parents and experts alike. A new guideline from the UK government suggests that children under five should have no more than one hour of screen time per day, with those under two advised to avoid screens altogether. This guidance encourages “screen swaps” — replacing screen time with activities like reading stories or playing games together. However, implementing this advice can be easier said than done.
Many parents find themselves struggling to balance their busy schedules, rising living costs, and the allure of technology. For Errol Murray, founder of Leeds Dads, helping families reconnect has become a personal mission. Every Saturday morning, he takes his 10-year-old son Isaac and a group of local fathers out for activities ranging from exploring insects at a nearby lake to attending soft play sessions that include a free breakfast.
Creating Meaningful Connections
Errol describes how these activities offer a welcome break from screens. He notes that when he gives his son a five or 10-minute warning to stop using devices, the response is often negative. “They get angry, they get upset, they get agitated,” he says. “You’ve got to find something that makes them turn away from phones, screens and tablets, because you get trapped there.”
The father-son duo particularly enjoys group walks in the park, especially when Isaac can bring his remote-control car along. “Doing something with your kids, instead of saying ‘see you when you get back,’ means you’re able to actively build a connection,” Errol explains.
As the Leeds Dads network grows, many parents admit to grappling with how to limit technology and foster meaningful connections with their children. New research from the National Literacy Trust reveals a 25% drop in the number of parents who play with their children daily since 2019. Experts emphasize that these interactions are not just emotionally important but also biologically crucial.
The Science Behind Early Language Exposure
Research led by Dr. Samuel Forbes at Durham University and Prof. John Spencer at the University of East Anglia examined over 6,000 hours of language exposure among 163 babies and toddlers. The study focused on the quality of language children were hearing, particularly through in-person human interaction rather than passive screen time. Using recording devices and MRI scans, the researchers found that children exposed to better interactions and more engaging language had greater myelination, which helps signals travel efficiently between nerve cells.
“The number of words a child hears at these early ages is literally shaping their brain,” says Forbes. “Every interaction is crucial. It’s never too late to begin talking to your child, and it’s never too late to interact in different ways. We can see what it’s doing to the brain.”
Kirsty MacDonald, head of early years at the National Literacy Trust, highlights that many families, particularly those experiencing poverty, lack the support and resources needed to nurture their child’s language and literacy development.
Finding Balance in a Tech-Driven World
For some parents, screens can still play a role in bonding with their children. Sam, another father in the Leeds Dads group, uses screens creatively. In his spare time, he produces music using a digital synthesiser on his tablet, a hobby he now shares with his children, aged five and six. “I’ve always really loved music,” he says. “But when I became a dad, I struggled to find things I could do for myself. Now the kids are old enough to enjoy and appreciate it, it’s become a really beautiful thing.”
However, introducing new activities into family routines isn’t always easy. Sam admits that when everyone is tired after work or school, sometimes the best option is to watch TV together. “You have to just seize your moments,” he says. “There are definitely times where you have to just go, ‘Look, everybody is tired, everyone needs a rest, the best thing for us to do is just watch some TV together.'”
Community Efforts to Promote Interaction
Despite these challenges, some communities are finding creative ways to help. Local libraries are seeing a resurgence in popularity, with spaces adapted to encourage interactive learning. At Irlam Library in Salford, the outdoor area includes “story nooks” and immersive play-based reading activities. Teacher Abigail has begun taking her two daughters, aged two and seven, to explore the space together.
Watching them both play, socialise, and build their bond has been a highlight for Abigail. “It’s just about trying your best,” she says. Her eldest daughter Ava has her own tablet, but Abigail has focused on discovering her interests away from tech, such as painting. Listening to her children and following their ideas for activities has led to unexpected experiences, like a picnic in their front garden.
Screen time for under-fives should be limited to one hour a day, parents told. “If my kids didn’t have screen time, I’d never get anything done.”
